Rethinking My Goal Weight

When I first met my personal trainer last October, he weighed me and did a body fat analysis. I don't remember the exact results off hand, but I do recall that I commented that, after reading a whole slew of "ideal weight" articles, I'd come up with 150 pounds as a reasonable goal weight for someone who is 5'6" tall. My build is pretty large, and 150 is a good stone heavier than any of the target weights the internet came up with.

Anyway, I told my trainer my goal weight and he said that with my body fat percentage and body type, it wasn't likely, but I could certainly get to the point where I look like I weigh 150. So yesterday during our regular session I asked him what would be a reasonable weight goal, and he suggested 180 pounds.

I'm sticking with 150 as my goal weight here for the time being, but his assessment did help me feel a little bit more patient with the process. My thighs and butt will always be relatively large, especially since they're already almost all muscle as it is. But I'm looking forward to a smaller belly. I miss my hourglass figure. :)

Random note: according to the internets, I can achieve "extreme fat loss" at 1800 calories per day. On Nutrisystem I've been eating around 1400 calories per day, but except for today I haven't been too terribly hungry. (This evening I was effing ravenous.) I'm not sure what to say about that, really. Just felt like jotting it down here.

Gym Recap

Since Jeev couldn't make it today, I asked him to tell me specifically what to do today in his absence. Amazingly, he actually gave me a very detailed workout. This is what I did:

Treadmill: 2.25mi, 36.5min, 272cal
I did a warm-up of .25 miles then alternated .25-mile "laps" of 4.2mph and 3.5mph.

Exercise: reps x sets [weight]

Push-up position rows: 16x2 [10 lbs/arm]
Push-ups: 10x2
Squats: 12x2 [with 12-lb bar]
Medicine ball slams: 15x2

Pretty good work-out over all.

By the by, Nutrisystem is going pretty well so far, though I foresee today will be a Hungry Day.

Nutribears (oh my)

Nutrisystem has made a lot of changes since last year. In addition to new food choices, they've kind of restructured the program to give you more variety. Last time, the snacks were all prepackaged Nutrisystem snacks. Now the only prepackaged one is dessert, and the rest are groceries you buy yourself. And while this might mean you're receiving less food for your buck, they've also added in a daily protein shake, which makes up a little bit of the deficit. The groceries are also more varied: you have "powerfuels" (proteins, more or less) and "smartcarbs" (starchy vegetables and more traditional carb). Also, you're supposed to get at least four servings of vegetables per day but they no longer have any requirements as to what meal you have to eat them at.

The best part is that the women's plan now has six "eating occasions" just like the men. Last year, my husband got three snacks a day while I only got two, and that really made my mornings long at work. So while I'm eating much smaller portions, I'm eating far more often. The only trouble is finding the time to dash out to the kitchen between meetings!

And then there's a somewhat stranger change: as an added incentive to use their online weight tracking website/community/thingy, every ten pounds you lose you receive a Nutribear. Not just a little blog badge; an actual Beanie Baby-type plushie.

I can't decide if this is kind of awesome or just really, really weird. I guess I'll decide if/when I receive one.

Here we go again.

I have two doctors (long story), and both of them were holding my prescriptions hostage until I did something for them: one of them wanted me to get bloodwork done and the other wanted an in-person visit.  So I paid the ransom and the good news is I've freed all my medications.  The bad news is twofold:

First, I've gained 30 pounds since July.  This is not okay.  Second, the bloodwork came back with "elevated liver function" and much higher cholesterol levels.

I know the problem: I eat too much.  My biggest issue is breakfast.  I go to the gym every weekday morning and pass by about half a dozen fast food restaurants on my way to work.  I'm starving after going to the gym, and often (way too often) I buzz through the drive-thru for a tasty treat.  See, I really love fast food breakfast.  Any other time of day I can take or leave it, but McDonald's sausage burritos and Burger King's croissanwiches.  Man, I'm drooling just thinking about them.

But the fact of the matter is that I weigh 226 pounds.  That's a BMI of 36.6, well into the "obese" range.  My goal is to get down to 150 pounds, which is at the upper end of "normal" for someone of my height.  And hey, I might not get there, seeing as I do go to the gym so much and am a bit more on the muscular side than many women my age, but I'd like to at least look like I weigh 150 pounds.

So, long story short, I'm back on Nutrisystem again.  It helped last time - I lost 25 pounds in about three months - and this time I'm going to keep going to the gym at the same time, so maybe I'll progress at a somewhat more satisfying rate this time around.

I won't lie - I'm totally bummed about this turn of events, and I'm going to be the crabbiest of crabby for the next few weeks.  Let's hope I like the new selection of foods they've added since the last time I was on it.  The protein shakes in particular look like they'll be helpful for my post-gym commute.

Running to Stand Still

Not literally running, of course. I'd considered titling this post "one step forward, one step back," but thought making a U2 reference was more snazzy. Or something.

Anyway, a couple things: first, I cancelled Nutrisystem. I've lost a fair amount of weight, but truth be told I have so much food left over that I'll technically still be on Nutrisystem for at least another month. Which is fine. My husband is looking forward to cooking more, and we've both learned a lot about portion control. My real issue will be lunch - I really suck at making decent lunches - but I think we'll be able to find some kind of reasonable substitute. There are plenty of, for example, single-serving soups out there. I'll find something I like.

Second, I cancelled my gym membership. I had mixed feelings about this, but in the end it just made sense. My main reason is because of my ankle. I got the results from my MRI last week and learned that I have tears in my lateral collateral ligament in two places, as well as multiple partial tears in the deep tissue of the deltoid ligament. I unfortunately couldn't get an appointment with the orthopedic surgeon until June 20, and if he decides surgery is the best route then I will be on crutches for the rest of the summer at least. It's not worth going to the gym just to do arms; I can use my kettle bells for that.

I could have just suspended my membership for a few months, but there's also the possibility of my life making a drastic change this summer, which would necessitate quitting this gym anyway. If things turn out not to happen the way I'm sort of expecting them to, I can always sign up with another gym in the area. I liked this one because it's comfortable and close to work, but it's also more expensive than other options.

I'd like to also mention that both Nutrisystem and my gym (Sport & Health) let me cancel easily and immediately. I had absolutely no trouble whatsoever.

Hungry McGrumplesaur Awakes

I am so starving. I could barely wait until 11am to eat lunch. I would switch my afternoon snack to morning except that I need to eat something right before going to the gym after work. So I just suffer. Hmmph.

Of course, I'm probably a special case, because I'm one of those people who can eat pretty much nonstop between breakfast and lunch, but then am almost never tempted to snack in the afternoon or evening, both of which are written into this program.

This past weekend was somewhat momentous, so I thought I'd share.

Saturday

• My husband and I went out to eat for the first time since starting Nutrisystem. We had Mexican food (Guadalajara in Charlottesville, VA), where we both ordered the chicken fajitas. They came with Spanish rice and refried beans, and of course there were chips and salsa on the table. I ate zero chips (!!) and only ate half my meal (and only one of the two tortillas). I did have all of my refried beans, because those are a special favorite of mine, but while I felt fuller than I have since starting Nutrisystem, I ate considerably less than usual and was not hungry.
  
• That evening was tough, though, because it was a party where people brought goodies. I purposely brought a veggie tray with no dip, so I had something to mindlessly munch on while chatting with people. I tried a little of most of the dishes, eating more than I should've, but far less than I normally would've. I also skipped all the crackers and chips (a special victory because Doritos and Tostitos are my favorites!).
  
• Near the end of the evening I was going to try a death bar (this amazing-looking/smelling dessert bar that appeared to be made from chocolate chip cookies, peanuts, and joy). My husband said I shouldn't, and I resentfully threw it in the trash. I was not happy, but at least I didn't succumb out of spite. :)

Sunday

• I had to spend most of the day out on the town. I packed one of my ready-to-eat Nutrisystem lunches (a chocolate peanut butter bar) and figured since one of my errands was right near a Whole Foods, I'd try out their salad bar. Despite being sorely tempted by loads of delicious-looking dishes, I stuck to the veggies and a light balsamic dressing. And I was full enough after that I didn't bust out the bar until about an hour later (though I was definitely hungry by that point).
  
• Later that afternoon, after tromping around DC for 3 nonstop hours, we stopped at a Starbucks to hit the bathroom. They had the most amazing-looking apple fritters, and I was hungry. But I didn't have one.

Today

• I was exhausted when I woke up this morning and was tempted to run through the McDonald's drive-thru just to get a large soda, but knew I'd be too tempted by my beloved sausage burritos, so I skipped it.
  
• In the office kitchen were all kinds of goodies: cucumber sandwiches, chocolate cake, scones, chocolate-pumpkin Bundt cake, and chocolate covered strawberries. I sat and stared at them on multiple occasions but managed not to actually put anything into my mouth.

Tonight I start the First Day to 5k program (again). Here's hoping my knees cooperate.

More Food Babble

Yesterday was difficult on the diet front. I woke up absolutely ravenous, and breakfast barely quieted my stomach. Work was the same as ever, but about two hours after dinner I was so freaking starving that I picked my dessert based entirely on its size (yay pound cake) and then practically inhaled it.

Today has gone much better.

I don't know how much weight one needs to lose before clothing starts to fit differently. I do know I shouldn't expect to lose more rapidly than a pound or two a week, meaning I'll hit my goal weight anywhere between this coming October and May of next year.

Talking to my sister helps, since she shares my genes and went through this process several years ago. I suspect she didn't lose nearly as much weight as I need to (I have roughly 70 pounds to go) but she understands the struggle.

So far the main lesson I am learning from Nutrisystem is to make the vegetable the largest part of the meal. For most meals we start with a biggish salad (with no cheese - a major change for me) and treat the Nutrisystem entree more or less as a side dish. It's a good thing we like salad, but I'd die if I hadn't found a dressing I like (Newman's Own light raspberry walnut vinaigrette).

The categorization of foods surprised me: carrots count as vegetables, while peas and garbanzo beans are carbs.

I've been crap when it comes to exercising this week. Mainly I worry that increasing the number of calories I burn each day will make it just that much harder to adjust to this dramatic decrease in calories consumed. (Okay, that's a lie: mainly I only want to deal with one thing at a time, and this diet is a hell of a one thing.) I do, however, plan to start running again on Monday.

Upcoming challenges:

• Doughnut Day. Every Friday morning my office provides free doughnuts, bagels, and muffins. I am weak in the face of pastry. However, I have a plan: one of my breakfasts on the plan is a chocolate muffin, so I'll bring that to work and eat it when everybody else is eating their Friday morning goodies. Luckily, the baked goods are one floor down, so I won't even see them unless I make a special trip.
  
• Saturday: going out to lunch with a friend. This will be our first meal out since starting the program. Not sure how I'll handle this one yet; it'll really depend on where we go. Luckily, the friend we're seeing is a Weight Watchers alumnus, so I have high hopes that he won't derail us by insisting we go out for pizza. :)

Further Adventures with Nutrisystem

Shortly after lunch yesterday I started having tummy unhappiness, which later evolved into severe abdominal pain and nausea. The mere idea of food did not appeal to me in the slightest, so I only ate my Nutrisystem entree for dinner, and later my dessert, skipping the extra stuff (veggies, fruits, and fats). It felt like someone had set fire to my stomach lining, but I am disinclined to blame this on the Nutrisystem food. I don't have what you might call a sensitive digestive system. Considering I've felt like I'm fighting off something for the last couple weeks, I think this stomach bug is just coincidence. After all, the stomachache came with a headache, and last night I slept for nearly 11 hours - and could have slept longer had my alarm not gone off.

The nausea and headache linger on today, but at least the stomach pain is gone for the time being. Breakfast (Nutrisystem breakfast burrito, blueberries, and light vanilla soymilk) does not seem to have affected my condition, so I am feeling optimistic.

Nutrisystem, Day 1

Today is my first day on Nutrisystem. (No, I'm not going to post every day, but this is kind of a momentous occasion, you know?) I had cereal with banana slices on top for breakfast (and discovered I actually shorted myself half a serving of protein, but that's okay), then for lunch I had a chicken quesadilla, yogurt, and more vegetables than I'd expected. I'm supposed to have two servings of veggies, but I didn't realize a serving of grape tomatoes was a full cup! Likewise with the green pepper. Dinner calls for two veggies and a fruit, and though I had enough peppers and tomatoes to make a single serving between them, I'll have to stop by the grocery store after work to pick up something else.

While my stomach is rather unhappy at the moment (probably because of the abnormally large amount of fresh vegetables I had with lunch), I haven't felt unusually hungry. I'm trying to figure out how to work my afternoon snack, since I'm really not hungry right now and I'll probably be eating dinner in the office around 5:00 since I want to be in Alexandria (about 30 miles from here, fighting DC afternoon rush) well before 7:00.

All in all, I think this is a totally doable meal plan, as I don't feel like I'm really denying myself anything. By the way, I'd also like to mention that we had a Valentine's Day party at work, with tons of delicious-looking homemade cupcakes and cookies and stuff, and I didn't eat any. Go me! :D

Pre-Nutrisystem Thoughts

So last night we ordered our first month of Nutrisystem. It was my husband's idea, actually: between his recent 37th birthday and friends losing weight and both of us struggling for so many years, he realized that we clearly can't do it on our own. We've tried a lot of approaches, from South Beach to food diaries to just making healthy changes to our meals. And still we stay fat, because while we know in our heads what portions we're supposed to be eating, it's hard to translate that to the plate, both realistically (understanding exactly what an ounce looks like) and personally (that is, having the willpower to limit our own portions). The idea behind Nutrisystem is that they do the calorie-counting and portion-control for you. Our plan is to do this for a few months (or however long it takes), get our weights down, and most importantly, pay attention to what and how much we're eating.

When we go off the plan, which we inevitably will (though who knows how long it'll be), we'll have a better visual understanding of portions and our stomachs will have shrunk so it takes less food to fill us up. Let's face it: it's really difficult to stop eating before you're full (or the plate is clean, whichever comes first). Since we'll be full faster (and presumably happy enough with our bodies that we're more careful about what we eat - it's easy to binge when you're already fat anyway), we should naturally eat less. It's all about creating habits.

The biggest change for my husband will be not eating the same thing every day (he has OCD, so routine is very important to him), while for me it will be not going out to eat for a while. Yes, the program comes with a dining guide, but it'll be easier to just stay in. I also anticipate being sad on Fridays for a while, when my office provides free doughnuts and bagels.

Despite all this, I am confident. The food is provided, so I don't have to just rely on my own (very limited) willpower. Maybe I won't drop 30 pounds in the first two months like my husband's friend, but I hope to see some sort of improvement. I'll still go to the gym, of course - that's my precious me-time - but diet is like 80% of the equation.

Our first shipment is supposed to arrive in about three days. I think I'll go eat one last Mexican Pizza from Taco Bell.